"Psychopaths are social predators who charm, manipulate and ruthlessly plow their way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered expectations and empty wallets. Completely lacking in conscience and feelings for others, they selfishly take what they want and do as they please, violating social norms and expectations without the slightest sense of guilt or regret. - Dr. Robert Hare,
Above is the unvarnished opinion of the
man who is, arguably, the world expert on the subject, who also
provides this list of characteristics of psychopathy.
Read over the characteristics
of psychopathy and descriptions of behavior
and strategies they employ.
Psychobusters confronts the issue of
how individuals can cope with the problem directly, using examples
from the lives of three women.
The approach is
not without risks and hazards, but if you have a psychopath in your
life you understand the costs they are already exacting and can best
decide for yourself whether this could work for you.
Because psychopaths study us from
inside our world, but are not of our world their behavior does not
include the limitations of compassion, empathy and conscience.
Their behavior is predatory. We are their prey. Because they lie
without conscience they feel no guilt. Therefore, when confronted,
either in person or in court, they are often able to persuade
listeners and juries. The victim, often already traumatized, is
likely to appear frightened, stammering, distraught. The psychopath
often appears cool and assured.
Additionally, even in our personal
lives, many people decide who to believe based, not on the facts, but
who is more likely to benefit them.
- Psychopaths use barrages of emotional abuse, directed at their victim. Shocked at the untruths, the victim is often traumatized into inaction, allowing the psychopath to get when he or she wants.
- Psychopaths study how to be charming. Charm is the bait which hooks their prey so the reeling in can take place and the evisceration begin.
- You never have a relationship with a psychopath, you have just not been consumed yet.
The Gradient in Psychopathy
Individual
psychopaths exhibit a range of behavior depending on their inherent
attributes for intelligence and other factors. Smart ones are far
more dangerous than dumb ones.
Psychopaths who are less intelligent
are generally focused on shorter range goals. The more intelligent
psychopaths may lay out long range strategies for obtaining their
goals, for instance running for Congress and becoming president, a
'defense' contractor, or some other massive accrual of power.
When the more intelligent of these
individuals, and at any time 20,000 psychopathic individuals with I.
Q.s over 180 are walking among us, gain power in government, finance,
or business, their impact is radically increased.
For all of these reasons the strategies
used by psychopaths need to be well understood by all normal people
so recognition of the psychopathic among us becomes less expensive
for us as individuals and as a people.
What we know today – Impact on us
as individuals and as a society
While our understanding of the
condition of psychopathy has grown enormously over the last 15 years,
coping with its impact on us, as individuals, and as a society, has
not yet really begun. Yet it must, and immediately.
The impact of psychopaths on finance,
government, the judiciary, and business, has grown enormously, along
with changes in law instituted by these same individuals to limit
their potential liabilities and facilitate their predations.
The more intelligent among the
psychopathic study our emotional reactions, emulating these to better
facilitate their manipulation of us emotionally and so control us.
The most successful con-artists are
psychopaths. As the psychopathic rise in influence they build a
culture among those around then which works to modify the behavior of
otherwise normal individuals, habituating them to accepting roles in
which they, too, act without conscience.
We are vulnerable to these
modifications of our behavior, as documented by the Milgram
experiment on obedience to authority figures.
This series of social psychology experiments was conducted
by Yale University psychologist Stanley Milgram, measuring the
willingness of study participants to obey an authority figure who
ordered them to perform acts which conflicted with their personal
conscience.
The chilling result demonstrated most
people will follow orders when these come from an individual acting
in authority.
Psychopaths, acting without conscience,
routinely assume roles of authority they do not possess, but also
abuse authority when able to occupy positions of authority
'legitimately.' When these are positions within government these are
actions taken 'under color of law,' and are actionable, when
recognized as such. However, psychopaths are rarely identified
through our justice system as of yet.
Estimates of the losses to all of us
through the the actions of psychopaths are not easily estimated,
though the one estimate by a recognized expert, neuroscientist Kent
Kiehl, placed the national cost of psychopathy at $460 billion a
year. Losses caused by psychopaths originate from multiple causes.
Individuals suffer dislocations, loss
of assets, decreased ability to work, loss of friends and other
relationships, and physical trauma. Psychopaths routinely destroy
family trust, the capital, which for all humanity, provides
stability.
These costs are also borne by the
agencies, public and private, which provide for those in need. Often
victims are forced onto welfare and made jobless due to the actions
of the psychopathic among us.
Psychopaths are born with the normal
range of I.Q.s. Victims lose their homes, their professions, their
self-esteem and can be left traumatized and unable to function.
Understand and take action.
Our Personal and Business Lives
Is there chaos in your life? Look for
the psychopath, be discerning, it is not always easy to identify the
correct individual. In families, others impacted themselves, could
be engaging in angry behavior as a result of their relationship with
the psychopath. Psychopaths sow hatred and distrust where ever they
go.
The psychopath is often found at the
center of the web of deceits which can stretch in all directions.
Psychopaths try to get those around
them to fight. When those in your family cannot trust each other the
psychopath can accrue power and control to themselves.
The cure for this is truth and
transparency.
If you are told something about another
individual ask them directly, and immediately, for the facts. Give
them a chance to defend themselves. A
psychopath will attempt to limit your communications through
manipulations all of which have the same bottom line, “don't
mention this to them,”
Nearly everyone you meet will tell you
to put your tail between your legs and hide when you realize you are
confronting a psychopath. Their reasons are numerous and founded in
undeniable fact.
Psychopaths, having no conscience, have
no limits to their behavior except how it benefits them.
All serial killers are psychopaths, all
con-men are psychopaths.
In professions and in their 'personal'
lives, psychopaths use charm, lies, power, manipulation,
intimidation, and extortion as part of their routine means for
achieving their goals.
They cannot be trusted. Ever.
The concentration of highly
psychopathic individuals increases as you move up the ladder in
wealth and status and these individuals are far more dangerous
because they are more likely to cooperate.
Psychopaths change the culture within
corporations, families, and all organizations where they achieve
footholds and power by influencing the attitudes and choices made by
those around them. These individuals become, 'situational
psychopaths.'
Inform yourself before you start.
Become familiar with the increasing body of academic information now
available at Life Stealers and
elsewhere.
Extracting Yourself
Extracting yourself from a relationship
with a psychopath is hazardous. Many people spend years in the
attempt, made highly problematical because psychopaths seize control
of assets and manipulate family members, persuading them to distrust
their target, thus isolating them emotionally and denying them what
is needed to escape. Also visit Love Fraud, which has an excellent
forum, offering support and advice from those who have escaped.
Changing your name, abandoning your
past, family pets, cherished possessions, sometimes even your family,
are all issues which you may confront if you choose to run.
IF YOU CHOOSE TO FIGHT BACK -
The court system has no framework for
recognizing the unvarnished fact psychopaths lie consistently and
persuasively since they possess no conscience. Our court system is
designed taking into account a human being who has a conscience and
exhibits behavior which reflects real guilt, doubt, and a normal
human reaction to stress.
Psychopaths emulate human emotions, but
do not feel them.
Our approach does not include taking
the psychopath to court, until and unless, you can overcome these
issues by presenting expert witnesses in court on these facts.
On this site we provide information on
fighting back using two tools, accountability and transparency.
You must clearly, thoroughly and
persistently document the acts of the psychopath, using their name
and providing proofs which, if presented in court, would be
sufficient to make your case without other testimony.
You must be prepared to be attacked,
ruthlessly, continuously, and viciously. Psychopaths lie and will
attempt to destroy all which makes your life worth living.
Although psychopaths tend to be loners
this is not always the case. They can and will cooperate when
cooperating is in their best interests, jointly. Read - When
Psychopaths Cooperate
Precautions
If the psychopath is a family member
you must never have undocumented communication with them again.
If phone conversations take place,
record them. Copy all communications, make multiple copies and keep
at least one off site.
Rewrite all wills and property
agreements to end any claims the psychopath might use in the future.
Notarize and file these with the court and send copies to all members
of the family and close friends with whom you are in communication.
Anything and everything can be used as
a weapon against you by a psychopath. Children are routinely
destroyed by psychopaths when their spouses attempt to leave the
marriage or relationship. Since our court system routinely shows
calloused disregard for the well being of children, you must take
this into account in advance.
Putting all of these materials up
online will both immunize you and help others avoid the psychopath
you are attempting to evade.
Make sure you change your locks, get
security if you believe the psychopath might present a physical
threat to you, your family, friends or property.
Coping with trauma
Anyone
who had been through a relationship with a psychopath will come out
of it with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Today technologies exist
allowing us to alleviate the symptoms and return to normal
functioning. Two excellent technologies are neurofeedback,
NeurOptimal
works well, though there are many others. Biofeedback is also
excellent. See Quantum
Alliance
These technologies, and more, are about
to become far more accessible.
Benefits
Freedom from
living with the chaos which accompanies the psychopath is sweet
beyond measure. You can achieve this peace along with renewed
stability.
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